[One shot] #1/3 - Ohmiya daily conversations - PG 13

yasmina

I hate you too

"You jerk~!"
"What?"
"You're so messy."
"Shut up. At least I don't eat all the food in one day!"
"......"
[pause]
"I was hungry. You're so mean."
"I know."

~~~~~~~~~

"What's this?"
"What's what?"
"This."
"Oh that."
[pause]
"So what IS it!?!"
"My underwear."
"What??"
"Yeah. You'd better let go, it's dirty."
"Ew! That's disgusting Nino!"

~~~~~~~~~

"I wanna make a barbecue."
"I'm playing video games. I'll come after."
"Fine. But not too late."

5 hours later.

"Nino!"
"What?"
"You didn't come out yet!"
"And?"
"It's been so long!"
"I didn't pass the level yet. I'm stuck."
"That's it."
[Ohno unplugs the TV.]

"OMAE!"
"Come out now!"
"NO! Plug it back in. Now!"
"You're such a little brat."
"Shut up. Why is it so important I go outside!?"
"Because, I wanted to tell you something."
"Tell me it inside! There's no difference. Idiot."
"FINE. I LOVE YOU NINO. YOU CHILDISH BRAT!"
"....."

~~~~~~~~~~

"I'm sorry Ohno."
"The feelings passed. You're too immature."
"Stop lying. Stuff like that doesn't go away so quickly."
"With you, trust me, anything's possible."
"Fine. I don't love you either."
"Ah. You're so mean to me."
"You just said you didnt...ah! Nevermind!"

~~~~~~~~~~~
A few days later...

"Are you sure this is a good idea?"
"What do you mean?"
"This is my first time. Should it be with you?"
"What do you mean?"
"You've had others before. This might really suck."
"Don't worry. I only had one girl."
"Loser. You could have at least lied about the number."
"Well, why should I?"
"'Cause I was."

~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Ouch."
"What?"
"That hurt."
"What? I didn't even put it in yet."
"No. Your nails!"
"Oh. Sorry."
"No sorry, just cut them."
"No way!"
"Well then. You're not getting any."
"Any of?"
"This. All of this."
[Nino makes circles around his body with his hands.]
"Oh brother."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"You know. It's true."
"What is?"
"That chocolate is better than sex."
"Really?"
"Or maybe it is with you."
"You're always so mean!"
"It's my job."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Are you cold?"
"No, why?"
"Were you cold then?"
"No. I'm warm actually."
"Hmm. Strange."
"What is?"
"You look smaller."
"Thanks a lot."
"Or wait. Maybe it was always like that."
"Yeah. Makes me feel much better."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Ohno. You look like a girl."
"Is that bad?"
"Nah. We needed a woman in this relationship anyways."
"How did you decide it was me? You look quite girly too."
"Yeah but, mine is bigger."
[Ohno sighs]
"Why do I even bother."
"'Cause I'm cute and loveable. Admit it."
"Damn you Nino."
"I know. You still love me."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Hey. I was watching that."
"Oh well. The cooking network sucks."
"It does not. It makes me hungry."
"Yes. That's why it's bad. We already don't have anything in the fridge."
"This channel is worse."
"No. Anime is good."
"No. 'Cause then you go out and buy the game. And THAT'S why we have no food."
"Shut up. I hate you."
"I love you too Nino."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I wanna move out."
"But why my pet!!?"
"Because. One, I'm not your pet. And two, you eat too much."
"Fine. I'm your pet. How 'bout that?"
"Okay."
[Nino rubs Ohno's ear.]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"How many days has it been?"
"Seven."
"Wow. When we go on break, you really do."
"Okay then Mr. Clean. How long since your shower?"
"Five days."
"And you're insulting me!"
"We have stuff to do. The floors need to be mopped. And the garbage needs to be changed."
"Well we have the choice, shower or do the chores."
[pause]
"I'LL GO SHOWER."
"NO WAY NINO! ME FIRST!"
[Nino trips Ohno and runs into the bathroom, locking the door.]
"NO! C'mon Nino. The floors are full of....."
[Ohno sighs.]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Do you want kids?"
"Why? Do you?"
"I don't know. You'd be a bad mother."
"What? I'd be better than you!"
"No! You'd eat their food for them! And then ignore them when they'd yell at you!"
"Not as bad as you! You'd let them starve while you played video games."
"I guess we won't have kids then."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"All we talk about is food and video games."
"And your point is?"
"I'm hungry."
"Why am I not surprised?"
"Go make something."
"After this level."
"You mean tomorrow."
"Move out if your not happy."
"I will then!"
"When?"
"Right now!"
"Okay, bye."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
On the phone with Nino....

"My mom bought me some pyjamas."
"What color?"
"Pink."
"Why exactly?"
"She said I need to be more girly for my husband."
"So when are you coming back?"
"Now."
[Ohno standing at the front door.]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Don't ever leave me Nino."
"What?"
"It would kill me."
"You left me."
"It was for one day."
"It would have been longer if it weren't for the pyjamas."
"I'm more sensitive than you."
"I can tell."
"You're always so sarcastic!"
"Really now? I didn't notice."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I don't want to see you anymore."
"But why?"
"We spend so much time together I forget to bathe."
"But why?"
"We're a bad influence on each other!"
"No. We're happy."
"I can't find my brush. It's in my hair somewhere."
"I see it there."
[Ohno tries to pull it out. No luck.]
"I'm not happy."
"I'll clean then!"
"Fine. I'll do my room."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Nino in his room...

[Nino humming.]
"Nino...?"
"Yes."
"Where are you?"
"Here."
"Here where? I can hear you but I can't see you."
"I'm in the pile of clothes. Sorting them."
"All I see is a ball of hair. Ah wait, that is you."
"Go away Ohno."
"Wait! I wanted to ask what I should make for supper."
"Oh no. Let me make it."
"But you're busy, I'm done already."
"Oh no you don't! Remember what happened last time?"
[pause]
"But that was the first firewoman I ever saw. Did you ever see one before?"
"That's besides the point."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Maybe we should get married."
"Why are you saying this all of a sudden?"
"Because, I'm old and you're moody."
"True."
"HEY! I'm not old!"
"You said it. And yes, you are. Granps."
"I want a divorce."
"I love you Ohno."

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The author: So there you have it. Crack, love and hate. ^-^

na-chan · Posted: Mon Jan 15, 2007 7:02 am Post subject:

zomg...these are the best lil convos... i love the layout, the language, the interaction, the characterization...EVERYTHING! it's so Ohmiya it's not funny! but it is...funny...that is...I love it! I can see them in my head as I read, which I'm really looking for in fics these days. So please write more! clapping