Awww!! Aminata is so cute! Really great chapter! I look forward to more!

tinkchick555 do you have any idea what happened to arashian.com? i'm going crazy without that site!

Don't worry! They're back today safe and sound!

yay! sorry for the short length of the chapter. The chapters from here onwards will be pretty short just cause i want to get over them quickly lol...

thanks for reading!

Chapter 12

Jun’s POV

“Have you been to cooking school?”

A timid yet intrigued voice asked from behind me.

“Hmm?” I asked absent-mindedly because my attention was focused on the shrimp that I was frying.

“Nevermind,” she sang with a sigh. Suddenly, I felt some warmth along my arm. Looking to my side, I found Aminata staring so raptly at the frying pan that she hadn’t noticed she was leaning into me, practically using me to keep her from toppling over.

As though feeling my gaze on her, Aminata’s avid eyes flew up to my face. I looked at the arm she leaned on and then at her, making her jump back reflexively.

“Sorry.” She murmured embarrassedly, making me laugh. Stepping aside, I held the spatula to her and hitched my head towards the stove.

“How about you give it a try?”

Aminata stared at me vacuously, “Very funny Jun.”

“I’m not joking.”

“Well then you fail miserably at being a serious person.”

The straight look that I gave her made her properly cowed, faltering as she looked away from me, “I can’t cook.”

“You’re one morbid person.”

“How does that make me morbid?” she asked arguably.

“How can you say you can’t cook if you haven’t tried?”

“I have.”

“Pouring milk into a bowl of cereal isn’t trying.”

The bashful expression on her face gave her away.

“Well, it’s too hot. You see the oil jumping?” she grappled.

Groaning, I threw my head back, habitually twisting the corner of my mouth.

“I loathe people who complain.”

“I’m glad you think your opinion is so important.”

“It is.”

“Not to me?”

“No?” I looked down at her, assuming a faux hurt visage that she wilted to.

“No…”

“That hurts my feelings.” I lied to her, making her blink worrisomely at me. Her reaction made me laugh despite myself, earning me a swat on my arm.

“I’m getting tired of your games—“

“The more we talk the more your shrimp burn.” Grabbing her hand, I closed her fingers around the handle of the spatula. After freezing Aminata tried to yank her hand away but I banded my grip tighter on her, stalling her flee. Glaring at me in mortification, Aminata began a slew of protests that went right above my head and over.

“No. You’re not going to run away. You’re always running away.” Even if I hadn’t meant to sound all deep and profound, the words flowed out of my words effortlessly. They made me think of her tumultuous relationship with Lamont and how he treated her like the dirt of this earth yet still expected her to be there.

“I’m going to get burned.” She wailed, her voice shaky and her eyes showcasing the true fear that she felt.

“Fine,” I groaned, standing behind her with my hand still closed over hers, “It wont hurt because I’m protecting you. Now this is how you do it.”

Quietly and uneasily Aminata followed my lead. I felt her trembling against my chest and sighed to myself, wondering why she was so afraid of me. Moreover, I wondered what the hell I was doing here.

Eventually she relaxed and I too became complacent on my own account. I never thought I’d be teaching a woman how to cook, seeing as to how it was meant to be the other way around. I never minded cooking at all. It was just something I wouldn’t prefer doing on a daily basis.

“Cooking is the way to a man’s heart.” I found myself advising her, feeling like I was stepping into a big brother role.

“Even yours?” she asked haltingly, making me laugh.

“I’m a man so I guess so. But…I’d take a bad cook over a stupid girl any day.” I explained.

“Do you think I’m stupid Jun?” she had turned around fractionally to look at me with curious yet self cautious eyes. With each passing second of each passing day I was growing to learn that Aminata had serious issues with herself as a person. I wondered why. At first I thought it was just about Lamont but she was always so uncertain about herself in regards to every single issue that I spontaneously pointed out.

There had to be something deeper there…an unearthed secret that haunted her relentlessly for her to be on the defense every other second.

“No…you’re just…slow…”

“I should just pick up this pan and pour all this hot grease on you for saying that.”

“I’m just playing…”

“No you’re not.” She turned around, watching avidly as I rotated our hands so that she could heedfully flip the shrimp with the spatula. My other hand was perched safely on the edge of the counter beside the stove. Aminata’s was close beside me.

“I like your skin tone.” She said suddenly, as though eying both of our hands like I had. Momentarily taking my eyes off of the shrimp which was at a respectfully safe low amount of heat, I eyed our hands, wrists and arms with a different perspective.

“Funny you mention that.” I said.

“Why? Isn’t that the first thing you think of when you look at how different our skin is?”

“I didn’t think of that when I looked at them.” I said, reaching for the shrimp and turning it off because it was just about ready. I was just about to shovel one into the spatula to catch a taste when Aminata grabbed my hands without preamble and examined them. Her diminutive, chocolate fingers held my hands like they were some ideal prize that she couldn’t believe was actually tangible. Her eyes glazed over with amusement and intrigue as she roved over them.

“No? You didn’t think of the difference?”

“No. They’re just hands.” I told her what I truly had thought. The contrast of our pigments hadn’t flashed through my mind at all.

“The first thing that popped in my mind was how different we are.”

“We’re not different.”

“Yes we are. I’m black…you’re…olive?”

“So?”

Her eyes flew up to me and at that same moment she stopped herself from saying whatever had been on her mind.

“Say it.” I demanded before she could timidly look away from me.

“Huh?”

“Say what you have to say. Or what you wanted to say.”

She dropped my hands like a hot cake and sought the shrimp, “Are these ready—“

“What were you going to say?”

“I don’t like my skin color.” She capitulated. Though the words weren’t regular she’d said them as mildly as she’d disclosed her distaste for stormy weather.

Carrying on like nothing had happened, Aminata pried the spatula from my hand to scoop up a sautéed shrimp. Puckering her lips she blew on the large piece of shrimp until she saw fit before snaking it in with her mouth and chewing. Her exalted reaction was immediate, making her stare at me gleefully.

“This is so good Jun!” she muffled with her hand courteously over her mouth, “Mmmmmm!”

She turned back around, scooped another piece of shrimp and after cooling it, held it up to my mouth. Letting her browbeating of her skin color go, I lowered my head until my lips were at level with the shrimp, ensnaring it in between my teeth. Throwing my head back I let the shrimp fall into the concave of my mouth and chewed, relishing in the spices and fish that danced deliciously against my taste buds.
My eyes widened and I reflected Aminata’s previous reaction, “Umai!”

“U-wha?” she asked in that airhead nature of hers.

“It’s delicious.”

“That’s what u-wha means?”

“It’s umai Aminata.” I corrected her with a shake of my head and a hapless, faint smile on my face.

“Umai?”

I nodded in assent, making Aminata squeal excitedly.

“Umai…” she said wondrously, her eyes wondering around as if she’d just discovered the ninth world wonder.

“Yeah that’s right.” I condescended with a laugh.

“Ekk!! Umai! Umai! Umai! Oh my gosh I love saying that word! Umai! U—”

“Okay you can stop now…” I told her laughingly but should’ve known that Aminata was on a roll.

“Umai! Umai! Uma—“

Stepping dexterously behind her I concealed her mouth with the palm of my hand, looking down at her in perplexity as I laughed.

“Nandaro…What are you doing? Stop that.”

In response I felt Aminata’s shoulders shaking but this time the shiver derived from laughing not panic like they’d been doing frequently all evening.

She said something but my hand muffled her response.

“I’ll only let go if you promise to stop being a pain in the ass.”

Her eager nod made me let go of her mouth. Turning back to me, Aminata poked her tongue out at me before giving me a shy yet cheeky smile.

“U—“

“Don’t even…” I warned as I stepped closer to her.

“If you promise to teach me Japanese I wont say that word again.”

“You’re asking me to promise to sign my death wish?”

She nodded innocuously, “That’s the general idea.”

“Ha!” I scoffed haughtily, breezing past her with my hands stuffed into my pockets, “Teaching you Japanese would mean spending more time with you.”

“Umai…umai…umai…umai…”

Ignoring her I sauntered right into the living room.

“Umai…umai…umai…” her voice never became distant like I’d expected and I supposed that she was following close behind me.

“Umaaaiiiii…ummmmmaaaaaiiiii—“

“Okay okay!” I’d whirled around and told her exhaustingly, “I’ll do it. Just…shut up.”

“Okay,” she said with a victorious smile, her hands clasped behind her as if she were as saintly as a nun, “I’m going to go serve you a plate of shrimp is that okay?”

“NO…I’ll come do it by myself.”

“Are you sure?” she asked, her voice drifting off finally. I rubbed the bridge of my nose, wondering how someone could make me feel so tiresome yet have me experiencing the most fun I’d had ever since I’d stepped foot on American soil.

“Yes. I’m sure.” I muttered, expelling a energy serrated sigh as I sat heavily on her love couch.

“Okay, suit yourself.”

Ignoring her, I kept my eyes closed, as sleep was slowly warming its way into my system.

Before I could fully relax, I heard something that nearly made me lose my faculties.

“Oh yeah, Jun?” I heard suddenly from behind, wondering how I hadn’t heard her walk up.

“Nani?” I muttered gruffly, lolling my head towards the source of sound.


“Umai!”

When my eyes flew open Aminata was scuttling into the kitchen. Shaking my head to myself, I looked straight ahead, unable to help the small chuckle that rumbled like the sound of distant thunder in my chest.

She was truly something else.

That's so cute! I love how she kept saying Umai!

Excellent chapter!

thank you hun!

Chapter 13

Aminata’s POV

Soon as the storm cleared, Jun had left, but we'd had a good time the entire evening. Like promised, he'd gone to the kitchen to fix himself a plate indeed to feast on while we watched the rest of the movie. With each passing session that I spent with Jun my perception of him continuously altered. He wasn’t what I’d expected. Quite the contrary in fact. He was generally a very staid individual but the fact that he had it in him to be playful and humorous made my affinity towards him heighten to a higher, slightly dangerous degree. I was liking him more and more.

That degree led to a dream that had me waking up with a large smile on my face. Despite the dream’s ambiguity, disorientation, and lack of organization, just the fact alone of him being in it proved enough to place me in a state of elation the moment I opened my eyes to a new day.

With my spirits soaring high I practically leaped out of bed with a new source of energy that I hadn’t felt in a while. I felt alive and rejuvenated, ready to take on the world and whatever obstacles and tasks it had awaiting me. Utilizing my toiletries after a refreshing shower, I was on my way to school in a jiffy, for the first time not really wanting to leave my apartment because of the memories that still lived there. Well, labeling what went on last night would be kind of overdoing it. Speaking of which, a part of me felt like I really was burrowing my head too deep, but I couldn’t help it.

The amount of fun that I’d experienced last night was almost foreign to me in its nature. It would have been an impeccable event had I not let these abruptly budding insecurities that had been flailing me as of late become exposed. As if I couldn’t have embarrassed myself far more than I already had around Jun, I did, and it made me thoroughly regretful.

Especially the comment about my skin tone.

I tried to convince myself that I wasn’t sure where it had come from when in truth I knew very well that part of the self-cautious subdivisions of my self derived from Lamont. The girl that he cheated on me with had been fairer skinned and all the girls that he dealt with right now were far brighter than I.

Admittedly, becoming insecure because of what some other guy thought of me was such a weak element of strong character I'd worked heartily to expunge. My grandmother had always drilled into my head that a woman should never let a man define them, yet there I was admitting to a guy that I was getting to know that I didn’t favor my own skin tone. Unfortunately, Lamont wasn't the only one to blame.

Amongst African Americans, being of the darker shade of skin was considered a not so pleasant feature. It’s the same sad situation in Hollywood where skinny garners more box office success than fat. Blue eyes earns more roadside billboards than regular brown eyes. Lustrously long silky hair is more desirable than the curly kink that made up my wild crown.

Gradually, I’d gotten over those insecurities when I’d arrived at college with a more imperative outlook on life than outward appearance—getting my education and furthering my passion for art. It seemed like Lamont was an evil spirit that led me back down the worn path responsible for my self-cautiousness.

Stepping out of my apartment I was assaulted by wintry air, a bit too unnatural for spring. Shivering, I rubbed my clothed arms, considering going back to the house to search for my woolen gloves. Back inside I marauded through many drawers until I found them. Once they were slipped on I'd hastily grabbed my car keys with the decision to travel in my car instead of going on foot in the blistering cold to my the bus stop.

That day was designed to be a bad day but I was too happy deep down inside to take note of it. I’d tripped and fallen in front of a bunch of cute guys posted against a car on my way to class. I’d received a low letter grade on an art project because I’d defied the teacher’s wishes by turning the intuitive drawing into a portrait. Sometimes I couldn’t help myself when it came to art. It was like asking someone who wrote with their right hand all their lives to use their left. The day got marginally worse when I was reminded of how broke I was when Gina had to purchase my lunch, thus reminding me that I needed a job desperately. Even then, my jubilant spirits didn't let those harsh truths about life get me down.

For only a split micro second i wondered if that's how true love made you feel. If it made you forget about all the world's worries because the world didn't matter when you were in love except for being in love.

I was a sad case, I knew. Danielle Steel books and romantic comedies had meddled with my psyche. My brain told me to slow my role; that correlating Jun with love was a bit much. I agreed and dropped the subject with myself.

I was just in a good mood and even if I knew why I didn’t want to acknowledge it. The thought recycled over and over in my head to the point where I started to think a tad bit too deeply about it. It still bothered me that Jun and I had different backgrounds yet were able to communicate with one another so…normally. Where I had found the guts to invite Jun last night in I didn’t know. It was an act of impulse that had no credible source of reason.

Apparently my thoughts were loud enough for my bestfriend to hear them because when she spoke she asked a question that hit the nail right on its head.

“What’s wrong with you?” Gina asked me over lunch.

I looked up from my untouched sandwich at her. It took me a couple of seconds of blinking her into focus and chasing thoughts of Jun away. Gosh, why the hell did I think about him so much? He made me feel so weird, like something was really wrong with me. I mean, if Gina could notice, then it meant my crush on him was deepening at a vast lightning speed that was too fast for me to catch up with.

“What do you mean?” I finally asked.

She frowned deeply, “It’s Lamont isn’t it?”

The mention of my ex-boyfriend made me cringe.

“No. Not at all to be honest.”

After staring at me for a few skeptical seconds, she asked, “What then?”

I hesitated. I didn’t want to reveal who I liked. But the dream had been oppressing me like a kid bully would hunt down his unfortunate victim for his lunch money. The way the dream along with last night’s unimaginable events repeated over and over in my mind made me feel as though I would lose my head at any moment.

The large gulp I took of my iced tea helped me brace myself.

“I had a dream.” I confessed. I couldn't hold the information in any longer.

“Really,” she drawled monotonously, pushing her glasses up the bridge of her nose, “So did Martin Luther King.”

“Gina!”

“Sorry!" she shrugged blamelessly, "But how am I supposed to know what that means?”

“About the guy.” I clarified uneasily.

“What guy?”

“The guy that um, the one that I have a small crush on.” Crush by now was an understatement but Gina didn’t need to know that.

“Really?!” Gina beamed at me and leaned forward eagerly and lowered her voice evoke intimacy, “Was it a sex dream?”

“No!” I shrieked a bit too vehemently, earning a couple of curious eyes in our direction. Licking my parched lips nervously, I tucked some hair behind my ear, shooting Gina a covertly offended and accusatory look.

A long lizard-like smile of triumph stretched her face, “Ah ha! It was!”

“It wasn’t a sex dream.” I defied with my face buried in my hands. The moment my eyes closed I envisioned Jun tracing light kisses down my neck. My eyes flew wide open to chase away the image despite the warmth it made me feel inside.

“So anyway before you tell me the nice sleazy details, tell me who this mystery crush is.”

“I would never disown my integrity like that.”

Gina laughed, sitting back, “Come on Aminata! You’ve never been so secretive about the guys you like lately.”

“Exactly because in the past you went and told every one of them.” Though truthfully, I couldn’t picture her running to tell Jun. I wasn’t even sure she knew who he was.

“Only because you’re too chicken to do it on your own.” She chided, spooning a mouthful of peach cobbler into her mouth. When we'd been going down the buffet line I'd declined the hearty dessert in exchange for not adding another pound to my already mounting weight. I'd been binging recklessly due to the intervals of depression I'd been going through.

“It was such a strange dream though Gina,” I went on, unable to restrict it to myself, “Like we were in this place…it was like in a village or something…just away from society. Maybe we were in some mountains or something. But we were just so happy and loving life and then all of a sudden this old lady springs up from nowhere telling us that we were stupid for being together. Then she said to Jun that he had disowned his family. And…I don’t know….Iguess we had a forbidden love kind of thing.”

In the midst of my confession I had began staring at a space on the table. Realizing that the table had gotten too quiet, I shot my eyes up to a confused Gina. My defenses rose alarmingly.

“What? Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Jun?” she said the word as if she had never voiced it before.

My heart damn near tore through my chest and I froze.

“Is that his name?” she prodded.

“How did you know?” I asked on a shred of air.

“You said ‘Jun’.”

My mouth dropped.

“No I did not!” I was trying to convince myself more than her.

“Uh…yeah…you did…who is Jun? And what kind of name is that—“

“Did I really say Jun?” I asked in mortification, my heart palpitating so fast I feared it would give out.

“Yeah…” Gina was looking at me awkwardly now. Moistening my lips daintily, I searched my whirling mind for a plausible exoneration out of this.

“No-no—well, his name is Justin. Jun is just, a nickname—but his real name is Justin—”

“Jun…Jun…why does that name sound so familiar…” she asked with a pensively, totally ignoring my pitiful explanation.

Oh gosh. She was going to find out! She couldn’t!

“Jun…the only Jun I’m aware of honestly is the one…oooh he’s the guy with the hair! In my psychology—“

When Gina stopped speaking abruptly and stared at me ogle eyed, I knew she had put two and two together. Unable to keep the barricades around me up any longer, I sighed in surrender. Gina’s gaped at me for the next few seconds which, to me, seemed too much like an eternity. I had to lower my face because it burned hot like a furnace and I didn’t want her to see my discomfiture.

“I cannot believe this.” She said in a light whisper.

“See I knew I shouldn’t have told you.” I murmured, feeling ashamed for some reason.

“Are you being serious?”

Without responding to her I grabbed my purse and books, ready to leave only for Gina to stop me.

“Hey, chill. Relax. I’m just asking.”

“No. You’re about to make fun of me.”

“I was going to do that but you seem pretty serious about this guy.”

I let my head fall to one side heavily, “I’m not serious about him. No one is ever serious about their crush.”

Gina only stared at me awkwardly wordlessly. I began to feel strange and regretted ever telling her about him.

“You know what. Forget it. This is the reason why I didn’t tell anyone.”

“Will you just relax? It’s just that I’m shocked, that’s all.” She took a sip of her diet soda as if all of this was too much for her to take in and the soda would help her accept it somehow.

“Why?” I asked pointedly, making her narrow her eyes at me knowingly.

“You know why. I’m not even going to sugarcoat it. I mean he’s…what is he…Korean?”

I let out an agitated groan and rolled my eyes, upset that my worst fears had manifested, “You sound so freaking ignorant right now.”

“How? How would I know what he is?”

“What does it matter what he is?” I retorted with asperity. Gina blinked at me in surprise.

“Come on now Aminata. You know that it does matter," leaning forward, she rotated her head from left to right searchingly, "Look around you, you don’t really see that many Asian and black couples together. Well, unless the guy is black and the girl is Asian. It's usually never the other way around.”

“So what are you trying to say?” I said in affront, folding my arms and sitting rigid as a statue.

After she didn’t say anything I went on the defensive when the rest of her comment sunk deep to the marrow of my bone. I reacted like I’d received an electric shock.

“And who said we were ever going to be a couple? Me having a crush on him doesn’t mean anything.”

Gina held my gaze for a while.

“Have you ever talked to him?” she deadpanned and I felt like I’d been exposed without clothes to an entire colony.

“No.” I lied. As if he couldn’t pick a better time to come to the cafeteria for lunch with his friends behind him—including the one from the movie theater with light brown hair, Oguri Shun I think—I felt myself being kidnapped by his presence. It was a miracle I was able to hear every single word Gina told me because I was so rapt.

“That’s exactly why it matters. I mean, I’m not trying to knock you down, but as your friend I just want to be realistic with you. The rest of the world will not only be realistic but heartlessly harsh," she sighed heavily, "Look, we’re much older now Aminata…we know those fairy tale love stories where the impossible happens...don't happen in real life. Those forbidden love stories aren't real," pausing for a wide expanse of quiet seconds, she finally picked up where she left of, "I mean, I don't want to kill your crush before it's even started. Hell, I wouldn't be saying this if I couldn't already tell that you really like this guy but...Seriously, you’re both from two extremely different cultures. You both talk to completely different people. Most of all," She held my gaze, "You’re from two extremely different worlds.”

I couldn’t respond to her because I'd helplessly broke our gaze to look at Jun from afar, blushing despite myself at how handsome he looked that day. From the corner of my eye I saw Gina turning to look over her shoulder at what I was looking at before facing me again.

Shying away, I lowered my eyes to my plate and forked the salad cluttered beside the cold sandwich but didn’t eat it.

“Even if you like someone, there’s a lot more to it than just liking them. You have to deal with the whole package, whether they look good or not. Do you see yourself hanging out with his friends? Do you see him hanging out with yours? Honestly?”

My eyes jetted up to Gina in brewing fury, but I backed down as though seeing her face made the truth more real. She was right. Jun’s friends probably wouldn’t be able to stomach me, and just by Gina’s reaction—my bestfriend at that—I knew the chances of Jun ever being able to hang out with my friends was slim to none.

The realization of that discouraged me immensely, to the point where I felt foolish and too idealistic for ever crushing on him in the first place.

“You’re right,” I murmured dejectedly, looking back at the table where he chatted and laughed with his friends effortlessly, something he would never do with me. Even though last night...

“It’s impossible. I don’t know what I was thinking…”

“Don’t get me wrong. He’s kind of cute, I like his hair mostly,” she said with a laugh but I didn’t have the heart to join her. My heart felt like it weighed a ton.

“You know when he first came here two years ago I remember all the Asian girls going crazy over him…like he was popular or something. Ha, I wouldn’t be surprised if he was a prince back in China or something—“

“He’s from Japan.” I interjected sharply. The ignorant, negligent way she talked of him and the way she judgmentally classified him made me angry for some reason. Gina’s arched brow went up in surprise at my outburst.

Immediately I knew that I was on the wrong and snapped unfairly.

“S-sorry,” with a heavy sigh I got up from my seat, looping the strap of my purse over my shoulder and carrying my books, “I just realized something I don’t mean to take it out on you. I’m going to go hunting for campus jobs before going home.”

“You’re not mad at me are you?” she asked and I paused, giving her question some thought.

“No,” I smiled bitterly and started to leave, “You just brought me back to reality.”
Two hours later I’d returned in the same building where the campus bookstore was located in the basement. Hugging my books close to my body with my bag pack strapped safely over my shoulders, I traipsed the metallic steps with great caution because of my heeled boots, wondering how my day had gone from an all-time high and descended. I wasn’t so much sad as just merely dejected by Gina’s true words. Reality was so unfair sometimes.

The moment I got down there I walked up to the art supplies section of the bookstore. The reason I hadn’t bought lunch earlier was because I had to purchase some extra supplies for the class's next assignment. A slight headache started to come along when I began thinking about college cost and if it was really worth it.

With an array of paint supplies in tow I walked up to the registrar to pay for them.

“Hey there how are you?” a frumpy old lady with stringy white hair greeted.

“I’m fine thanks. And you?” I reciprocated, setting my work on the countertop.

“Fine. It’s a grave day outside today though isn’t it?” she asked as she scanned the items.

“Yeah its—“

“Umai.”

The words spoken by a deep baritone so closely in my ear that I felt the warm breath of whomever was responsible, made me jump in fright. As I turned around I saw Jun step into my line of view. With my hand over my rattling heart I looked up at him, catching respite.

“Jun! You scared me.”

“What are you up to?” The small easygoing smirk on his face made me feel bubbly inside. Despite my grumpy mood I found myself smiling back at him. It was nice to know we’d gotten to a point where he could effortlessly come up to me and say hello. Like a dream come true.

At least he didn’t know what he did to me. He didn’t know that I was a nervous wreck whose mind and body would shut down everytime he spoke.

“Nothing, just shopping for some school things. You?”

Sighing heavily, Jun answered as he scoured around the bookstore with the same disdain that I felt towards the university’s constant vacuuming of our wallets, “Same. They’re always trying to get us to buy new stuff.”

“Um, that will be fifty eighty-one.” The cashier interjected. I’d forgotten all about her. Jun always seemed to make me forget about everything around me whenever he stepped in.

“Oh! Sorry.” I dug into my purse. Since I’d cancelled all my cards all I had on me was cash save the money in my bank account.

After literally cleaning out my purse—which was dry now thanks to the dryer—I realized that the money was not enough. The worry on my face must have shown because Jun spoke.

“What’s wrong?” he asked me and when I raised my eyes I saw him examining me skeptically.

“Oh-uh—nothing. Um,” I turned to the cashier and bracing myself for the famous walk of shame, “I changed my mind. I don’t think I’ll get it.”

I felt Jun’s eyes on me, my throat and eyes caustic with the temporary pains I got from poverty. I hated to borrow from my classmates but it looked like that was what I had to do. What was in my savings account was for next month’s rent. I couldn’t afford the art supplies even though I needed them.

“Are you sure?” the lady asked, making me want to claw her face off for asking me such a question. Of course I was sure. It was like asking someone if they were sure that they were broke.

“It’s okay. I got it.”

The words made me cut my eyes at Jun.

“No Jun. it’s okay.” Even as I said the desperate words Jun handed the lady a hundred dollar bill. She too appeared unsure of whether to take the money or not.

“Jun please don’t. It’s okay.” I don’t know where I found the will to speak because his kindness had me so appalled.

“It’s for school right?” he asked, looking at me in slight confusion.

“Yes but—“

“Then it’s important right?”

“Yes but—“

“It’s okay. I got it.”

“Jun. no I couldn’t. please—“

“Uh, we close in two minutes.” The cashier said, only adding onto the pressure I already felt.

“Look,” Jun began while folding his arms, “if it’s that harmful to your health that I’m just trying to be a nice guy and help out then you can pay me back.”

“What is this a charitable cause to add merit to your character?”

“I rest my case that you’re very morbid. How about I’m just helping someone who gave me a place to stay with a hazardous storm around?”

“Well, you’d already come all that way to give me my wallet…”

“That was an act of convenience. I was in the neighborhood.”

“We close in one minute.” The lady informed, earning a dirty look from me.

“Fine,” I succumbed grudgingly, my head held low, “Do whatever you want. Oh…thanks…”

All the while I kept my eyes averted from Jun I felt them on me with the same studiousness he held whenever he was looking at me, like he was trying to figure me out.

By the time the lady had bagged the goods and handed them to me, giving Jun his change, my self-cautiousness was at overdrive as it bludgeoned me.

“What…” I said to Jun, feeling pitiful and morose once again but for a different reason this time. He’d yet unveiled another weak facet of my life—my lack of money. With all the modern apparel he wore I wondered if Gina had been right that be belonged to some monarchy belonging to a family filled with generations and generations of wealth.

“Why are you so defensive?” Jun asked and before I could answer him someone with what I could only describe as a humble, smooth voice intervened.

The vernacular spoken was something incoherent to my ears. The handsome guy with sandy brown hair had stepped up to Jun, asking him a question. Then, stopping abruptly, he looked over at me. politely he gave a slight bow and uttered an apology, his accent much stronger than Jun’s when he spoke the universally western language.

“Oh it’s okay.” I told him, plastering a smile on my face. It seemed like Jun just hang around good looking people because most of his friends were cute. Especially this one. At the movie theatre with the dark cloaking us I hadn’t got a clear enough view of his face but now that I saw it my feminine side could only ignorantly give him praise for being a looker.

What ensued next was from Jun, a brief Japanese introduction of me to who I assumed was Oguri Shun and Oguri Shun to me. With one of the nicest, crooked smiles that I’d ever encountered, Shun extended his hand out to me. Coyly I placed my hand in his, beaming back at him. He seemed like a pretty nice guy. Nicer than Jun at least.

“Nice to meet you.” He said with his engaging smile that made it hard for me not to smile back.

“Nice to meet you too. He’s so cute oh my gosh,” I turned to Jun, “Way hotter than you.”
Narrowing his eyes at me Jun gave me a pissed off look when Shun said something to him and Jun responded, never once taking his eyes off of me. Laughing, Shun said something in response. I felt like I’d acconmplished something when I heard the word ‘arigato’ somewhere in the midst of words that I didn’t know.

“He said thank you very much. He thinks you’re cute too.”

“Thank you!” even though I smiled appreciatively at him I didn’t believe he truly meant the words. He was probably just a nice guy doing and saying nice guy things.

“Is this your first time here?” I got over my nervousness and took the liberty to ask Shun.

Raising his brows, Shun stood straight as he looked over at Jun.

“He’s not fluent in English…yet.”

“Oh! Sorry.” Today was officially marked Aminata’s Embarrassment Holiday.

“It’s okay—“

“I’m sorry to interrupted but we are currently closed.” The cashier imposed and we all knew that to be our cue to leave.

“Jun did you get to buy what you came here for?”

“I don’t need it till next week so it’s okay.”

Simultaneously we all exited the bookstore. Right before I could bid them farewell and retreat to the safety of my car, Shun said something to Jun while looking at me.

“Hey Shun just reminded me, my friends and I are driving to the beach this weekend. He was wondering if you wanted come.”

Stumped beyond belief I stuttered, trying to find a way to turn down the offer without seeming impolite. Gina’s words echoed so vociferously in my ear that I let those fears hinder me from saying what I truly wanted to say. Of course I wanted to go. What woman in their right mind would ever turn down the opportunity to accompany Jun to the beach? With the possibility of seeing him half-naked? I mean, come on.

But, even though I was a woman, I definitely was not in my right mind. I was knowingly going to let the chance of a lifetime pass me by.

“I would have loved to but I’m going to visit my mom this weekend. I’m so sorry but thank you for the invitation.”

Snickering at me, Jun rolled his eyes westward before looking at me disbelievingly, “You know that I know that you’re lying right?”

I felt like I’d been exposed naked, hoping Shun wasn’t familiar with the English word ‘lie’. Before I could tamper down his reproach he was already speaking to Shun, who after a while nodded and said something back. Jun soon translated what he’d said to me.

“Well he said he wishes you’d have a nice trip to see your mom. We’re going to head out now.”

At that very moment Shun’s phone rang and after excusing himself from us in Japanese, he told me it was nice to meet him again before heading towards the stairs as he answered his phone.

Jun and I being left alone made the nervousness that was me resurrect.

Before I could thank him, Jun gave me one last parting phrase, running his eyes from the souls of my shoes up to my face until he was looking at me squarely.

“Like a man called Bierce Ambrose once said, ‘No one can lie, no one can hide anything, when he looks directly into someone’s eyes.’” He paused, made me uncomfortable as he looked into my eyes deeply. Then he turned around, speaking over his shoulder as he walked off with his hands embedded in his jean pockets, “ ‘A lie is just an excuse guarded.’“

*dying* This is soooo good!! I really hope that you write more soon!

sorry it's a very vague chapter but today i was just so out of it i couldn't finish it.

Chapter 14

“Don’t call me again Lamont!”

My harsh demanded was followed by the deafening banging of my phone when I slammed it on its cradle.

Ever since our break up, Lamont had been calling me nonstop like he was a desperate thirsty man and I was the fountain of copiously flowing water. At first it was a little bit expected because Lamont encased this inability to accept refusal from anyone else. I thought he’d call a few times to persistently remind me how stupid that I was to let him go before he finally gave up on me and moved on to the next girl.

Unfortunately, that’s not how it occurred.

It was nearing a month since our break up and the calls were still coming. The calls were now not only grating my nerves but also making me a trifle suspicious.

“Damn, is he still bothering you?” Gina asked me from my living room where she was seated.

“Yeah. I’m just going to change my number. Everytime I block him he calls me from a different number. Anyway, are we still going to the party?” I deftly switched topics, advancing into the small living room.

Seated Indian style in the middle of the carpet, Gina squinted at the newspaper splayed in front of her.

“You don’t need to go for a party. You need me to give you some therapy.” She murmured absently.

“No,” I plopped down on the couch in front of her, “You just want to go see that new Brad Pitt movie.”

The words made her all smiles. She had no shame.

“Oh gosh, I’d so marry him.” The words were accompanied with her hand fanning her face as if famed actor Brad Pitt’s hotness was too much for her to bear.

“Girl, I can’t even blame you. I’d marry him too.” I admitted pitifully with a laugh.

She’d leaned forward and circled a portion of the newspaper with a pen, her voice straining when she spoke, “Anyway, no partying until you’re ready to date again.”

“I’m more than ready.” I knew very well that I wasn’t though.

“You think you are. Come on,” Gina stood up suddenly and shook her legs, “Let’s go. We have to hurry. The next movie starts in fifteen minutes. And no don’t say you’re too broke to go to the movies. It’s my treat.”

“Fifteen minutes?!” I exclaimed, “We’ll never make it on time!”

By then Gina had slipped into her coat, crabbed mine and had come to me to start pulling on my wrist.

“Yeah we won’t if you keep laying around! Hurry!”

Left without much of a choice, I pushed myself off of the couch, grabbed my keys off of the coffee table and followed her out of my apartment.


“Man, just give me one night with Brad…” Gina droned in a woolgathering tone as we moved along with the slow traffic out of the movie theater.

“Yeah, he’s a cutie all right.” I murmured, folding my arms against the cold that swirled around us when we stepped out of the theater. Revoltingly I’d left my sweater telling Gina I felt hotter than the norm but now I wished I had it.

“Cute? Don’t insult my future husband like that. He epitomizes shekushi.”

“She-wha?”

“Sexy. That’s how we’ll say sexy now. Shekushi.”

“Oh.” I laughed, then thought to myself how Jun was the real euphemism for sexy…or ‘shekushi’ as Gina liked to call it.

My thoughts must have had some sort of summoning power because from afar I saw dark locks and a slinky yet attractive physique that were all too familiar. Just as the figure was turning around, the hairs on the back of my neck spiked up. Without rational thought, I grabbed a hold of Gina’s arms, sliding behind torso where I hid behind.

“Oh my gosh! He’s there!” I squealed, mortified.

“What? Who?” Gina asked obliviously.

“Him!”

“Who?!” she asked emphatically.

“Jun!”

“Jun?”

“Yes!” I peeked beside her arm to have a look just because I couldn’t help myself. He was standing with his friend Shun at the concession stand, doing some motions with his hands as he talked to Shun. Man, for someone to be as handsome as Jun was a crime. It certainly wasn’t fair.

“I don’t see him.” Gina stated in slight frustration.

“There. He has on the maroon vest with the gray shirt inside. The black pants. Forget all that, you see his hair? You can’t find Jun’s hair on any person—“

“Oh there he is. Want me to wave him over?”

“I’ll kill you!”

“Kill me? I just treated you to a movie and you want to kill me? And anyway I cannot believe this,” Gina’s head was slightly turned, her chin nearly meeting her left shoulder, “You’re hiding from a guy?”

“Yes I’m hiding from a guy damn it! Let’s make sure they don’t see us.”

“Uh…why?”

“I embarrassed myself in front of them a few days ago.” Ever since the bookstore incident I’d been hiding from Jun like a criminal would hide from the police. I was still too ashamed by the fact that he’d paid something for me.

“How?”

“I don’t know. Just don’t—Oh my gosh they’re coming this way!” holding Gina’s arms firmly I hid behind the trunk of her body and kept on rotating her as Jun moved. Unable to help myself I peeked from her side to see him walking with that uniquely cool, laid back aura about him. To both me and Gina’s surprise he gave her an acknowledging nod. Shun, who was walking right beside them, gave her a grin that had star qualities and if I didn’t feel my friend melt against my hands then I didn’t know what swooning was.

Those thoughts were interrupted when Jun unexpectedly talked to Gina.

“When Aminata comes out of her hiding place, tell her I said hi.”

My face burned like a writhing furnace. While nodding at Jun Gina let out loud peals of laughter that made me clout her on the back of her head as I revealed myself. Smirking faintly at me, Jun shook his head as he said something to Shun, who had looked my way and waved. Just because Shun was so irresistible I smiled back at him and noticed his eyes shifting back to Gina. Too preoccupied with my own problems I glowered at Jun once again, who by then was not paying me any mind and looking straight ahead as he walked off.

“Oh my gosh. I think I’m going to like Jun.” she said after her descent from her laughing high, scratching on the back of her head where I’d hit her.

“Shut up.” I hissed, glancing at the back of Jun’s head, feeling some warmth within my chest.

“Come here,” Gina suddenly grabbed a hold of my hand and started pulling me with her down the hallway of deep crimson carpet, “We’re going to watch another movie.”

“Huh? Gina? What the—we haven’t even paid for it! ”

“Right. It’s called sneaking dumbass.”

“Gina—We could get kicked out or even worse taken to jail—“

“Shh! You’re spoiling the fun! And anyway, don’t lie to me and say that you don’t want to see him.”

“This is stalking!”

“Seeing…stalking, same thing. Now shut up and follow me.”

It was pointless for her to say that seeing as to how she’d been dragging me with her the entire time.

Despite my civility I felt myself smiling inside because it was true, I did want to see him and I could only wonder where this abrupt change of heart from Gina came from.

I surmised it came from Shun, but I knew I could be wrong.



“What did you say his name was again?” Gina asked me once the movie was over and we were seated in the dark theater, waiting for everyone else to leave.

“Oguri Shun.”

“He’s so sexy.”

“I thought you didn’t care for guys like…that.”

Gina usually liked African American guys, despite being Middle Eastern. But I couldn’t even fault her because Shun had a transcendent beauty to him that could make any woman from any walk of life weak in her knees. Jun had the same weak-in-the-knees quality but his derived from making people fear him.

“Well now I have a change of heart.” She said haughtily, “Come on let’s go.”

“Gina I did not sign up for this.” I told her with a groan as I too rose to my feet.

“Shut up and follow me.”

Sighing heavily, I did as told. Once we milled out of the theater we spotted them not too far off and as if knowing me too well Gina grabbed my hand and started leading us towards them.

“Hey! Jun!”

When she caught his attention he stopped heading to wherever he was going and turned around to accommodate her with a puzzled look on his face.

“Hey, I’m Gina.”

He ran his eyes up and down her frame skeptically, “Hey…”

“I know your name is Shun.” She regarded Shun who just gave her a funny look. Jun said something to him, probably translating, making Shun break into a smile, bobbing his head in a polite nod.

Jun’s eyes fell on me, making me feel uncomfortable.

“Hey guys…” I said in an obligatory tone, shifting nervously from one leg to the other. My heart of course had reverted to the same irregular palpitation whenever I was around Jun.

“Sorry. I know you and Aminata know each other, and I think it was rude of her not to introduce us.” Gina kept on, making Jun laughed faintly.

“Yeah she tends to catch up a bit slower than most.” He said and they shared a laugh. The dirty looks that I gave both of them would’ve scared Mr. Grinch himself.

“Did you like the movie?” she asked both Shun and Jun. Jun translated to Shun who nodded with a smile. The more Shun smiled the more Gina smiled and I felt like rolling my eyes at her.

“It was okay. The acting could have been better.” Jun remarked with a fold of his arms, his eyes scouring the crowds that filled up the theater to capacity. As he did that I was able to catch a glimpse of his milky virile neck. The illicit thought of feeling the skin there with my lips made me so ashamed I wanted a shovel so that I could dig my grave right then and there.

“You’re one to talk. You make it sound like you know everything about acting.” I found myself saying.

“I bet I know more about it than you do.” He countered with a cool smile that made me want to claw his face out.

“Okay guys, enough already. Hey what are you guys about to do?” Gina asked suddenly.

With a sigh, Jun unfolded his arms and slid his hands into his pockets, “We were thinking about seeing some new club on 54th street that some friends had told us about. The Hot Spot I think is what it’s called.”

Gina’s theatrical gasp made me worry that all the air had been sucked out of her chest, “Oh my gosh, we were headed to the same place!”

I was just about to protest and tell the truth that we weren’t when she turned to me and asked stealthily, “Weren’t we, Aminata?”

I had bouts with myself over whether to shut her down but didn’t have the heart to embarrass her like that in front of the guys. Sigh with self resignation, I looked over at Jun to see that he’d already been eying me studiously as though he was waiting to see if I’d answer to what he already expected that I would.

“Yeah we were.” I murmured despite myself.

My eyes must have been playing tricks on me but I caught the inkling of the tiniest of smiles on Jun’s lips.

Tonight was going to be a long night I presumed.

Lol, poor girl. Gina sure likes dragging her around.

oh this is an idea of what Aminata looks like

Only registered users can see links on this forum! Register or Login on forum!

it's not the entire chapter. I'll post that tomorrow hopefully.

Chapter 15

The place was so packed that it was rocking with all the people milling in and out of it. The first thing Gina and I noticed was how almost everyone in attendance was of Asian descent. It didn’t matter to me particularly, but it was a little bit amazing to me to see other cultures living in the melting pot of America in their own islands. My people did that too, and in that short period of time I was enlightened of how people cocooning in their own world could cause separations and peninsulas in a sense from other people and their worlds.

Humans were so caught up in their own culture that they failed to open their eyes to others, nearly forgetting that other people had their own lifestyle.

To say that I knew there were clubs like this strictly of people from one kind of race would be folly. It was rather intriguing but dually intimidating.

While I felt like I stuck out like a sore thumb Gina didn’t seem to care. All she’d been focused on was finding Jun and mostly Shun. On the car ride to the club—which she only found out the directions by surfing the internet on her phone—she’d assailed me with question after question about Shun and his origins. Unfortunately for her I knew nothing about him except for the fact that him and Jun seemed to be pretty close.

“You know I might just dip into this Asian persuasion like you.” She said in a giggly nature, hugging herself with her coat as we stood in line.

Though her comment was beyond ignorant and unacceptable, I could barely pay her any mind because I was far too cautious of how much more different we were than everyone else. Well, me more than Gina. She could pass for someone from the Philippines and didn’t look as out of the ordinary as I did. At that moment not even my crush on Jun was enough to persuade me to believe that being there was a good idea.

“You should call Jun up and tell him we’re here.” Gina offered. I looked at her like she’d lost her mind somewhere along the car ride.

“I would do that.”

“Then? What are you waiting for?” she asked impatiently and I rolled my eyes, looking the other way only to be startled by the unkind stares a girl with a short pink skirt and a tank top along with her pose were giving me.

“I’d give it to you if I had his number.” I told Gina absently, turning towards her while tucking some lofty hair behind my ear, “Do you see the way people are looking at me? Like I’m…sickly or something.”

Gina let out a loathsome sigh.

“You’re so freaking paranoid it hurts. Can’t you just relax?” Gina asked plaintively, making me glare at her.

“You’re not the one getting dirty looks. People are looking at me like I don’t belong here.”

“Nobody is looking at you alright? Come on we’re next.”

Sure enough we were next in line and as we stood behind the chain that barricaded us from the bumping club, the meaty, bulky bouncer clad in all black stood at the threshold eying us with a scrutiny that made me feel like he had x-ray eyes and was seeing right through our clothing.

I’d been feeling rather hot when I’d driven over here with Gina and without better judgment had left my sweater in the car. Now I wished I had it.

“You can get in.” he pointed at Gina, making me feel the backhand of rejection like no other. Gina’s reaction was more vocal than my aghast one.

“Excuse me? Why can’t she come?” she demanded.

The bouncer examined me with disregard.

“We don’t accept her kind here.”

“My kind?!” I finally spoke up, my voice sharp and affronted.

“Sorry but we don’t.” he affirmed. I don’t know why I was shocked, but I was nonetheless. Racism was something as a black girl that I experienced a lot but whenever it stared at you fresh faced it made you feel as though you were experiencing it for the very first time.

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?!” Gina shrieked, stepping up to the six foot two hundred puond man who could crush her tiny waist with one hand if he wanted to. Grabbing a hold of her arm I retracted her admonishing step towards me.

“Let’s just go Gina. It’s not worth it.” I told her despite the fact that I wanted to give the man a shocker by calling him all the bad names possible that I knew—which were many.

“You don’t talk to her like that!” Gina went on, “If she’s not coming in then I’m not coming in.”

We were already attracting a crowd by then which was the last thing that I wanted. Swallowing with difficulty, I pulled on Gina’s hand to try and dissuade her from causing much more of a scene than she already had.

“Suit yourself,” the bouncer snickered, ogling over Gina’s legs bawdily as he rubbed his chin, “It would be a shame for a fine thing like you to let yourself go to waste cause of your friend. Who isn’t too bad looking. I mean, I could do her but…we just don’t let her into our clubs cause she’s not one of us.”

If I hadn’t known any better Gina was about to reach up and slap the man but at that very moment but something unexpected happened.

“Is there a problem?”

Both Gina and I followed the sound to find Jun standing a few feet behind the bouncer.

The bouncer who had been browbeating us turned to Jun. Realistically, this guy was ten times Jun’s size. He could take Jun down in a split second if he wished. Yet, not once did I sense or better yet see an ounce of fear from Jun. Not once. The cool, calm demeanor he always enforced was in full fledged motion now, his hands in his pockets. Unlike earlier, he wore a baseball cap low over his head that shaded his eyes but I was able to catch the glint in them that seemed to dare the bouncer to even test him.

Of all the times to get green with envy I did when I saw a petite girl who’d been standing by sauntering to Jun’s side, practically using him for support with her gangly arms circled around his forearm. There was a possessive and arrogant smirk as she eyed both Gina and I before turning towards Jun regarding him with starry eyes as if he was her trophy and she was proudly showing him off for the world to see.

At the girl’s sudden brazen move the look on Jun’s face was a priceless one of annoyance but he was too preoccupied by the incident taking place between the bouncer and us to really do anything about the random girl.

“Nothing. Just some girls causing trouble.” The bouncer explained with an undertone of timidity that galled me. He was much bigger than Jun. He could blow him one in the gut and have him out like the burnt out fuse of a light but yet he seemed to have recoiled and that enlarged bravado that was him mere seconds ago had evaporated like fan blowing at smoke.

Before responding, Jun uncaringly shook the bothersome girl’s arm off, rendering her pissed and offended. She shot me a dirty look that I ignored because Jun was now galvanizing forward with slow, measured steps and a slight tilt of his head backwards.

“From where I’m standing I didn’t see them doing anything but trying to get into the club. Just like everybody else.”

“W-well. I told the other girl that she couldn’t get in.”

“What other girl?” By then Jun was only a foot away from the man. They weren’t exactly at eye level but with the way Jun was boring holes into the man’s face one would’ve thought that he was towering him. My knees began to quake from the pressure of nervousness. Suppose the man tried to punch him? That would be too devastating and I didn’t want it to be done all in my account.

“The other one. The different one.” The bouncer tried to keep his macho ambiance but soon as he said the word different Jun’s fine brows wiggled in something between irritation and discomfit.

“Different? In what way?” Jun raised his chin belligerently, “What exactly makes her so different?”

“Jun it’s okay. I was leaving anyway—“

Jun looked at me shortly as he spoke, “She has eyes…a nose…a mouth…legs…” his gaze switched back to the bouncer who appeared to be growing beet red from the embarrassment Jun was causing him, “What’s so different about her than anyone else?”

At the daring eyes of Jun the bouncer refrained from saying that my skin color was what made me so different to the point where I was prohibited from entering the club.

The broadened chest of the bouncer deflated and looking away from Jun, he murmured grudgingly, “Nothing.”

As if not convinced, Jun kept his eyes pressed on the man, intimidating not only him but everyone else surrounding him. Then as if certain that his point had driven home, he stepped back slowly, his hard face relaxing a little bit, “I thought so.”

Switching his gaze to both Gina and I—me flinching from the unheralded look—he looked back over at the bouncer and with a jut of his chin, ordered him to let us in.

Chapter 16

Since my feet were frozen to the floor, Gina was the one who had to grab my hand and drag me in. With my head held low, I let Gina lead the way as she followed Jun and Shun. All the while the music had been bumping, the bass so deep I could feel its vibrations through the soles of my shoes. The overall club was tenebrous save the neon disco balls that spilled and permeated variants of color whimsically like it was having a dance of its own.

We broke through the sea of people, following them to a section bulwarked by red velvet ropes. Behind those ropes was a staircase that led to a place that had a crimson imprint of ‘VIP Section’ above it.

“Oh my gosh! We’re going to VIP! I knew this Jun guy had amazing.” Gina exclaimed. Unlike her though I was more the skeptic but followed nonetheless. Even though I appreciated him saving the day like he always seemed to do, I wondered what gave him the right to order that man around like he owned the place.

Everything just felt so fishy and even though we’d gained admittance inside I still felt very much out of place. I wasn’t used to feeling out of place. Normally when hanging with my crew I was very much in. To put it simply, I was part of the in crowd until recently when I’d been having these setbacks because of my break up with Lamont. I was giving him way too much credit.

Once we got upstairs, I instantly noted an atmospheric change. The VIP section of the club was far more laid back than the writhing spirit-filled downstairs and I found I enjoyed this more than the other.

It was reserved with a bar area over on the right. The bartender there was flipping alcoholic bottles like they were gymnasts, catching them just as deftly in his hands before draining the drinks into highball glasses with rocks of ice in them.

The people there were not many but certainly dressed for the occasion.

Against my own will I felt a bit dressed down but couldn’t brood over that for too long because Gina’s excited voice sliced into my thoughts.

“Oh my gosh! Aminata, do you see how exclusive this place is?” she gushed, her eyes glittering like stars. She acted as though this was her first time coming here, but I couldn’t deny how top-notch the club looked.

“Yeah,” I conceded as I too examined the place, “It looks nice.”

“Ah look! We can even see ourselves on the floor!”

Horrified, I looked at the floor, feeling a sudden violation.

“It’s a bit too exclusive for me.” I murmured distastefully and even if I wore pants I clamped my legs together tightly, making Gina roll her eyes in vexation.

“Gosh, what has happened to you? You’ve become such a party pooper. You used to be so much fun.”

“That’s because I know when to draw the line—“

My comment was rudely intercepted when someone unruly bumped into my shoulder. The intruder breezed right by without so much as an apology. I recognized the girl from earlier—the one hanging on to Jun. Gina got ready to go attack the girl with her sharp-like teeth and her claw-like hands but I held her back, telling her it wasn’t worth it. What I did notice that the girl was the same one who’d been smothering Jun earlier.

“What is wrong with these folks…” she murmured and though I could only wonder with her, I knew not all of them were assholes. Just the few who made it their duty to be assholes.

“Oh! There he is…” Gina’s excited voice tapered off as she pointed at Shun, her stance becoming rigid, “ugh who are all those hoes up on my man.”

“Gina, seriously. He is not your man. You just met him tonight.”

“So?” she held her head regally high, “I already know that we’re meant to be.”

“And I already know that you’re delusional. Oh yeah, in case I forgot to mention, he’s not that fluent in English.”

“Really?” her brows went up.

“Yeah, really.”

“Ekkk!!” her excitement raised to a higher nuance, “That’s great! I find it exotic. And he’ll think I’m saying exotic shekushi things.”

“Gina have you lost your mind? I’m starting to think that Pepsi you bought at the movie theater had vodka in it. You’re behaving worse than a drunken person.”

“How do I look?” Gina completely ignored me when she asked that, looking at me for approval as she smoothed down her hair.

“What are you about to do?” I asked distrustfully.

“Slap you if you don’t tell me how I look.”

“You look great but—“

“Thanks now excuse me while I go woo him.”

Gina expelled herself from my company and swept to where Shun stood with two girls standing on either side of him.

Flabbergasted I stared at my bestfriend rattle the other girl’s nerves and welcome a smile to Shun’s face. I knew she often got like this from time to time but only when she thought a guy was drop dead gorgeous. I shouldn’t have been surprised but I was just because Shun was different from her norm. I wanted to be mad at her for leaving me standing there on my own but I couldn’t. Haplessly, I smiled at her, glad that she was having the time of her life.

Sighing heavily, I rotated on my heels uncomfortably, looking for somewhere to go instead of standing there oddly in the center of the spacious floor. Various couples were dispersed through the room on love couches, hurdled together in a love-spelled realm of their own, detached from the real world.

A few girls gave me the eye, not the rude eye but the curious eye, probably wondering what someone as different as me was doing here. Getting over my nerves, I ambled over to the bar, hoping the bartender didn’t encase similar hostility to the bouncer.

The apprehension I felt was dispelled by the easy smile that broke through his face.

“Hey pretty lady. What can I do for you?”

Then like a fool, I remembered that I didn’t have any money. Soon as the thought crossed my mind, he added, “Everything in VIP is on the house.”

He must’ve felt my relief or at least saw it on my face because he laughed becomingly when I let out a huge sigh.

“Okay. Just Arbor Mist on the rocks.”

“Arbor Mist? Aw come on, that’s child’s play.”

“It’s also being the driver’s play. I’ll be driving back home so I don’t want anything heavy.”

“Alright. Arbor Mist on the rocks coming right up.” He promised with an engaging smile that I returned.

Once he brought me the drink, I thanked him, and we dipped into another conversation. He asked me where I was from and I too asked him. He was born in Korea but had come here to go to school. I was really enjoying talking to him but other patrons came over with orders to have something to drink and I could no longer hold his attention any longer. I hang around until I was done with my drink and as he prepared the other customer’s drinks he asked me if I wanted another.

Politely I turned him down, asking him for the directions to the restroom. After having given them to me, I went on my quest to find it down a deserted hallway. On my way there I saw a stream of light that I soon learned came from open double doors leading to a balcony.

Curiosity killing the cat, I ventured towards the light until I stood inside the threshold of the balcony.

The balcony was roomy and different from the rest of the VIP section. It was less noisy and calmer. It was basically everything that the club house wasn’t. Including the fact that Jun was solely standing there. He was staring aimlessly at the night painted ahead of him.

That night I noticed things that would’ve normally been of no importance to me.

Like the moon.

And not because I was looking right at it. It was because of the effulgent reflection of it that I saw on Jun’s face. His skin was like porcelain. I’d once thought that his skin was unblemished and perfect. But it wasn’t. there were faint adolescent scars along his high cheek bones, where his mouth watering side burns softly run down. But one would have had to notice them with magnified eyes because they were microscopic.

I say I noticed the moon that night because I saw those faint scars, which in turn made him seem more real to me…more present, reminding me that what lay beneath the surface were scars that only a heart and not the naked eye could see. I knew I was thinking a tad bit too deeply about it, so I thrashed those thoughts away.

“I wonder what Jun is thinking…” I sang jokingly as I crept up beside him.

Startled by my arrival Jun jerkily turned to the sound of my voice. The moment he looked at me I had to laugh. There was a brief childlike innocence about him, his dark eyes wide and his luscious mouth forming a small vowel ‘o’. His visage was priceless to me because I was prone to seeing Jun either with a hard, displeased or black and nonchalant look on his face.

When he realized that it was me, he relaxed. I found myself being glad that the guarded expression that had once always taken over his features was no longer ever present like it used to be. He looked comfortable and unbothered by my presence and that made me really happy and relieved that joining him onto the balcony hadn’t served as a catastrophe.

“Oh…” he faced forward again, “You.”

“You were thinking about me?” I teased, wishing in the depths of my soul that that’s what he was thinking about truly but knowing better.

“Eh?” he looked back at me, his brows knitted together confusedly.

“I’d asked what you were thinking about.” I reiterated laughingly, brushing some heavy bangs away from my forehead. Jun acknowledged the movement of my fingers, looked keenly at my hair, before finally answer.

“Oh,” Jun broke into a faint grudging smile, “Nothing. Well, a lot of things.”

“Really? Like what?”

The smile on Jun’s face slowly drifted away as he held my gaze for a while. He appeared to be conflicting with himself whether to tell me, a stranger, what hibernated in his mind.

A stranger…

I wondered if that was what he still insignificantly thought of me as.

“Nothing really.” He murmured with a light shrug, confirming my wonders. I nodded my understanding, knowing that everyone had the right to privacy sometimes.

Sighing heavily, Jun turned around, leaning his lower back against the cement balcony with his arms folded. I looked straight ahead at the vast earth of deep forest. Then I raised my eyes to the cloudless night sky. Each star harmonized in the background with a gentle twinkle and the moon beamed taking center stage, the leader of the night choir.

“It’s beautiful tonight isn’t it?”

“Sorry about what happened at the door.”

Jun’s sudden apology made me regard him in perplexity.

“Jun, there’s no need to apologize. It wasn’t your fault.”

“But he represents me. So it was.”

“How does he represent you? You’re a real weirdo you know that?”

“Have you ever missed something that you never had?” Jun asked me suddenly, and when I looked at him I saw that he’d turned around once again was looking up at the night sky.

The question was so sudden and so out of context that for several moments I didn’t know what to tell him.

“What do you mean?” I finally asked him when I came up short of trying to understand what his statement meant.

“I mean have you ever missed something that almost happened but didn’t?” he asked and the question hang in the air unanswered.

“Uh…sorry Jun I haven’t. I don’t really know exactly what that means.”

“It’s okay. Nevermind.”

“You look nice today.” I told him abruptly, making him look at me.

What had possessed me to say that I don’t know. It’s not like the alcohol I had taken was strong or anything.

“Arigato.” He told me with a nod and I smiled at him.

He smiled back.

“You know…you remind me of something. Something that I miss a lot.”

“Oh? What is that exactly?”

“Home.” He said, looking straight ahead again. Giving me his side profile which made me weak.

“Home?” I was startled, “I remind you of home? How?”

“I don’t know. There’s a certain warmth about you that reminds me of the people I left…” he bit his lip in regret and from the way his voice tapered off I knew that home was a place that meant a lot to Jun. I couldn’t say the same for myself. One of the reasons I was so happy to go to college was because I was going to get away from all the troubles home brought me.

“You really do miss it huh?”

“A lot.”

“So why are you still here?”

“I’m trying to finish college then go back. I have one more year.”

“One more?” I was shocked, “Didn’t you start two years ago?”

“Yeah but I went to summer school all those years and took a lot of classes. So I’ll be a senior next year.”

I gaped at him, “Wow Jun that’s amazing. You know I may not know everything about you, but I can already tell that you’re an over achiever.”

Jun laughed, “I guess you could say that.”

“Don’t you ever get tired of trying to be the best all the time?”

The question seemed to have struck Jun because he turned to face me, leveling his eyes with mine which were shaded by the baseball cap’s brim.

“At times. But isn’t that what life is all about? Doing your best?”

“I guess so.”

“You guess?”

“Well, I guess I’m the same way in some aspects. I’m competitive and try to see how well I can do various things.” I explained bashfully.

“I think your insecurities stand in the way though.” Jun said after a while.

“Insecurities?” I was a little bit offended but moreso because I’d been so vulnerable enough to let them show, thinking that nobody else noticed. But here this guy standing beside me had me already figured out.

Jun smirked condescendingly, “You know there are things that you’re not really confident about. I think they stop you from giving your all. Maybe because you’re afraid of rejection or getting hurt. I don’t know.”

I was silent a few moments before adding, “Come to think of it Jun, I think you’re the same way.”

“Eh?” he was genuinely surprised and I nodded emphatically.

“Sometimes I think you put off this hard, cold demeanor just to fend people off because you’re afraid of letting people get too close to you. For whatever reason, I don’t know, but I know it exists. It takes you a long time to get close to people, I think.”

From the way Jun looked at me I knew I’d struck the nail right on the head. For several moments Jun said nothing to me. All the while my heart rate sped because I began to feel remorseful, thinking I may have stepped over the line.

“I’m sorry.” I apologized as I turned away.

“No. You’re right,” it was my turn to look at him to find him giving me a grudging, reluctant look, “I don’t know how you knew, but you’re right.”

Jun was the first to turn away and continue looking out to the night. I followed pursuit, feeling the gentle night breeze and enjoying the way it rustled the trees sedately much more than the hard music thumping from the clubbing going on a few feet away.

The silence was broken when Jun spoke again.


“But once I get close to someone, it’s hard to shake me off,” he looked at me askance with a smirk, “So you better watch out. I can be a pest you know.”

Jun’s words made me smile and feel warm inside.

“Well, it takes a whole lot to annoy me. I’m the queen of annoying people.”

“Really.” Jun said sardonically, as if he knew all too well about my peeving antics. I playfully swatted him on his arm and he laughed.

“I wouldn’t mind if you annoyed me anyway.” I told him and he simply looked at me.

Unable to hold his gaze, I laughed nervously, tucking some hair beneath my ear.

“You know what Aminata, you’re not so bad after all.”

The words made me look at Jun. There was an unmasked honesty about him that I wasn’t used. I knew that I could get used to it though.

When he saw how shocked his words made me, he continued.

“I misjudged you when I first met you. At first I didn’t even notice you but now…I realize that you’re a good person and I can see us being friends for a long time.”

Jun’s words placed me on cloud nine, and I literally thought that I was floating. This time there was no sense in hiding my blush and as I turned away from him, Jun laughed, touching my shoulder concernedly.

“Are you okay?”

I wasn’t because the simple touch of his hand made me melt into a puddle but somehow I managed to keep myself harnessed upward.

Unable to speak, I